First Date Chemistry

Published: 09th February 2006
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First Date Chemistry

Although the nervousness of a first date can somewhat hamper the flow of your true and wonderful personality, there are a few signs that you'll notice when things are really going great. The conversation will flow. There will be a natural rhythm to the dialogue, each person contributing and taking turns in the spotlight. You'll enjoy listening to them tell you their tales, and you'll know that they are paying attention to what you have to say.

The sparks will be there. The flirtation will be high, natural and lighthearted. There will be more touching at the end of the date than there was in the beginning. Let there be laughter. Easy, natural humor, laughter, giggles, smiles and comic relief all add to the pleasure and ease of the date.

Ask yourself, 'what is it that would make you more comfortable"? What could they do for you that would make it go smoother for you? When you answer those questions, you can turn tables and do exactly that for them

o Give them a warm smile
o Make eye contact. Looking at someone directly in the eye gives the sense that you're open, honest, and paying attention.
o Make them feel welcome by reaching out to them, pulling them closer into your personal space.
o Compliment them on their appearance and accomplishments.
o Draw them into a conversation and then be interested in their responses.
o Be kind, polite, attentive to their needs, gracious, and chivalrous (for men)
o Be relaxed with them and let them follow suit.

Where to go?

A first date should be short and sweet. Since you're at the initial stages of discovering more about each other, a long date may be more than you can handle. It may become uncomfortable if you find that really don't have much in common, or that you've run out of things to talk about. If the date goes well, then a shorter date will leave you both wanting for more. You'll part with a pleasant feeling, looking forward for more contact.


o A full dinner may be too long and complicated. It may involve more of an expense than desired or expected.
o A movie or a concert doesn't allow to you speak with each other.
o All all-day skiing trip could be tortuous if the chemistry doesn't happen, and could give rise too all sorts of complications that could bring out the worst in one or both parties.
o A company party or family event has obvious pitfalls and traps

Instead first dates can take place at a coffee shop, over lunch, or at a comfortable bar over a drink. If you've determined that you both have dogs, you could've a first date walking them in the park and getting an ice cream from the vendor. A sporting event may be acceptable if both parties really have an interest in the event.

We had started this part with a quote, and let me end it with another quote:

"The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people, much more strongly than even the final surrender, because this kiss already has within it that surrender"

About The Author:

Pradeep Aggarwal is the creator of Dating Tantra. For FREE
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